Family Discussions

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Again, the twins were arguing. Being twins, there was much similarity; however, being twins also meant that each had to find her own personality apart from the other. Today, they had begun a game in the car of “I Spy” which culminated in a disagreement about the color of bird each had seen. Jan had claimed it was red, and Ann had rebutted with, “No, it was blue!” And the argument had begun.

Seeing that the argument was not going to end, Mom interjected with her own observation. “Girls, both of you are correct. Jan was looking out the window on her side of the car and saw the red bird. Ann, you were looking out the window on your side and saw the blue one. I hap pened to see both birds since I was not focused on only one side of the road.” After a few sighs, giggles, and apologies, the twins were calm once more.

Ann asked Mom why she and Jan seemed to disagree so often. Jan offered, “Maybe it is like the bird problem. We just see one side of things sometimes. No one can really see both sides of something all the time. Right, Mom?”

Mom replied, “You are right. That is why it is better to try to see other sides of a question, to prevent arguing all the time.” Ann said, “It’s hard sometimes. I like being a twin, but I want to be me besides just someone who looks like someone else.” “Me too, and I don’t want to always argue, and I hate it when some one thinks I am Ann,” add Jan.

“Girls, each of you has your own personality, even though you look alike and sometimes dress alike, and you like some of the same things. What you need to remember is that you are not carbon copies or clones of each other, because Ann has her own thoughts and Jan has hers. What is in your minds and how you deal with life is your own.”

Discussion: Have you known someone with whom you always argued? Have you tried to find your personality by trying to be different from one of your siblings or other people? Do you like how that worked out? Would you like to find more ways to agree with others?